in my battle with religion, i am really to blame


I wrote this after Rev Jo’s class on Gay Christian Beliefs tonight, after giving myself a week to calm down after last week’s class.

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5 thoughts on “in my battle with religion, i am really to blame

  1. I think you’re making a lot of progress. A lot of people don’t get as far, they usually give up. But if I may, can I also add something? Yes, studying the Bible to know for ourselves is absolutely the right way. But we also have to ask Jesus what the truth is. Most of us go about our daily lives and never ask God to reveal His thoughts to us. There are some pastors who read the Bible and never ask God to explain it to them. We become very limited that way.

    Still, God bless you tdub, in Jesus’ name! May you be blessed with peace and knowledge of the deep things of God! 😀

    • That is the exact realization I had tonight! Here I was blaming a church–religion–for teaching me what I now perceive as untruths and dogma that was very hurtful to me. And yet I was the one who assumed that because they said it, it must be true.

      “they spoke as one(s) with authority…”

      Anyway, such a basic idea, I know, but it hit me like a ton of bricks.

      Thank you for reading and providing encouragement.

  2. I just want to give you a huge hug right now for the courage you are showing in dealing with this. I came out in 2008 at 26 years old as a born-and-raised fundamentalist Christian and know what a whirlwind of a ride it can be.

    Yes, ultimately, it is your fault (and mine) for not coming out sooner. The fact is that the mental chains holding us back from being fully ourselves are illusory, but it can be so hard to accept that, especially if you were raised to believe that every word of the Bible is absolutely true and every word the pastor says comes from God himself. (How curious that God is always male.)

    The threat of hell looms over us for having those thoughts, but once you step away and really think about it, that makes no sense whatsoever. It’s like believing that Washington chopped down the cherry tree and never questioning the veracity of that story. But you took the big step! You engaged your mind and it led you into the light and into actually living!

    Thanks for sharing this.

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